


matt asked us about voltron and the shit hit the fan

by HyperchaoticStarlight (MVPYurio)



Series: waiting on the world to end [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Completely, Drabble, Established Keith/Lance (Voltron), Family Fluff, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, M/M, Post-Season/Series 03, Short One Shot, Silly, Swearing, age disk horse™, and the shit just completely hits the fan, except this time it's with coran and pidge, short and sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-02
Updated: 2017-09-02
Packaged: 2018-12-22 18:17:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11972970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MVPYurio/pseuds/HyperchaoticStarlight
Summary: “Okay, so, call me dumb, but what is Voltron? What do you guys do?”





	matt asked us about voltron and the shit hit the fan

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whichlights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whichlights/gifts).



> Thanks to [Cass](http://citricsapphic.tumblr.com) for beta-ing and [Rose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whichlights/pseuds/whichlights) ([witchlightsands](http://witchlightsands.tumblr.com) on tumblr) for helping me plan!

“Okay, so, call me dumb, but what  _ is  _ Voltron? What do you guys do?”

They were all in the living room, trying to decide what to watch.

“Not dumb at all,” said Shiro. “It never occurred to me that we hadn’t really explained. Allura, care to explain?”

Allura’s eyes became slightly starry, the way they always did when she was talking about Voltron. “Voltron is a weapon made out of five sentient lions that come together into one being. Each lion has a Paladin—that’s Keith, Lance, Hunk, Pidge, and myself—who bonds closely with the lion and with the other Paladins. When Voltron is formed, he is the most powerful weapon in the universe. That’s why the Galra have wanted to control Voltron for so long.”

“Yeah, they’re pretty set on that one,” said Lance. “Kinda gets annoying.”

“So… are all of the lions identical?” Matt asked. “Or do they do different things?” Everyone began talking at once, causing Matt to stare half blankly and half in shock.”

“One at a time,” said Shiro.

“You can’t boss me; you’re six,” Keith retorted. Everyone started laughing while Shiro glared and then promptly buried his face into Matt’s shoulder.

“Okay, but seriously,” said Allura, bringing everyone back to the matter at hand. “Voltron is shaped like a soldier, with a head, two arms, and two legs. Keith pilots the Black Lion, which is the head of Voltron both literally and figuratively. Similarly, the Red Lion and her Paladin are the right hand of Voltron, literally and figuratively. That’s Lance.”

Matt narrowed his eyes and gestured towards Keith and Lance. “So that puts you two in charge?”

“Wait… wait, it does!” Lance’s eyes lit up. “I’m second in command!”

Keith smirked. “Yup.”

Both Shiro and Hunk shook their heads. “Uhhh, I still think Allura should be in charge, since this is her castle, she’s a princess, and the lions were her father’s,” said Hunk.

“Well, I’m the oldest,” said Shiro. Immediately, loudly, and simultaneously, everyone reminded him that he was six. “Oh, quiznak off.”

“Even if you take in Shiro’s ‘actual,’ non-leap-day age, I’m actually older by about a week,” said Matt. “Maybe I should be in charge.”

Pidge looked directly at her brother. “Try flying a sentient robotic cat in the middle of battle, and then merging with four other sentient robotic cats, all while trying not to get killed. Then we’ll talk.”

“Are we talking about who should be in charge of Voltron?” Coran poked his head inside the room. “Because if we’re going by age, then it should be me. I’m forty.”

Keith and Lance had long stopped paying attention, as they were flirting and giggling to each other about being in charge. However, Coran’s comment brought Keith back to the present. “Dude, there’s no way that you’re forty,” he replied.

“I am!” Coran protested.

“If Coran is forty, so am I,” Pidge deadpanned.

And chaos ensued. Everyone was talking, everyone was laughing, Hunk was breaking out the birthday calendar, and Matt was begging Shiro to remind him to _never_ _ever ask about Voltron ever again._

Meanwhile, Lance was pouting as he snuggled closer to Keith. “Can’t we just agree that the lions decide who’s in charge?” he whined.

“Oh, that’s unfair,” Pidge groaned. “You’re only fine with that because you’re second in command.”

“Yeah, what happened to Keith being the worst leader?” Hunk asked.

“Lance is over that now,” Keith explained, massaging Lance’s back. “Yeah, Lance?” Lance practically  _ purred  _ in response.

“Love’s gotten to your head,” Shiro muttered.

“Sure has, man,” said Lance. “How could it not have? Your little brother’s amazing.”

“Awwww,” Keith cooed, wrapping his arms around Lance. “You’re amazing too, babe.”

**Author's Note:**

> I know, I know, this one's super short. Honestly it's a little weird for me too; I'm not used to writing proper drabbles.
> 
> In other news, I'd like to humbly thank the Ninjago fandom, which yes, I'm now officially in, _yes holly and sam and rose I am one of you now_ , for inspiring me to hurl more shit at the Age Disk Horse™ fan. Voltron fans who have never interacted with this stupid lego show and its horror show of a fandom: you think the Voltron age discourse is a hot mess? Pal(adin)s, [you haven't seen jack shit.](http://witchlightsands.tumblr.com/post/162696793395/for-those-of-you-who-missed-it-the-lloyd-is-forty)
> 
> So yeah, that's where that shit at the end comes from. Open your eyes, sheeple. Everyone you know and love is forty years old. EVERYONE. FORTY.
> 
> Aaaanyhoo, y'all know the drill—find me on Tumblr @sing-a-rebel-song or as Mod Keith @everything-quiznaks-so-much or as Mod Allura @queenshippingofficial!


End file.
